Yesterday was one of those days. A day where I have a ton on my mind and yet a million things to do (or so it seems).
The ram has been getting out for three days in a row. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday were all started with getting the ram back into the field. He has become a pain in the rear and very destructive. He has broken two gates, the siding on two sheds, and has crawled under the fence. He is wanting to be with his ladies, but darn it(!), can't he just baa and complain like a normal sheep? Guess not.
Yesterday morning he actually got out twice and so I decided to do some sheep rotating and got him where he wanted to go. After all, what else needs to break in order for a ram to get his way. Nothing, nothing at all.
On another note, it seems that hard work always seems to make things clear. Things that have been fuzzy and lines that have been blurred. I decided to thoroughly clean and de-weed our green house yesterday. I am going to hang a few clothes lines inside and make it my 'dryer' for the Summer. The room is too hot to try to have plants in and so I figure I'll put that heat to good use and dry my clothes in there. It's really a perfect situation. I can hang and dry my clothes without the world seeing my 'dirty laundry', so to speak. Plus, my clothes will not get any tree junk on it due to the roof and we can go without using a drying for a while.
While I was spraying, scrubbing, and pulling weeds I was thinking about my decision of whether or not I should go off Facebook. I was also thinking about what else I needed to change in order to make my mental load seem less stressful. Honestly I don't have an extremely stressful life, but for whatever reason I don't manage well having a ton on my mind. Maybe that's the downside of my personality. I've always been a more laid back person and I am most definitely NOT a type-A.
Here are my two scenarios:
- I need to practice more self-discipline when it comes to what I do in my day. That Facebook isn't the problem in and of itself, the problem is my lack of self-control when it comes to how long I am on it or how many times I check up on it. Do I really need to delete it if the problem has more to do with me? Am I just going to be replacing it with something else and so need to deal with the cause and not the symptom?
- I need to get rid of the temptation all together and to rid myself of the struggle for where I'm spending my time. I know that I am a all-or-nothing personality and so want to take this into consideration. I'm not spending all day on Facebook mind you, but enough.
What is most convicting is, how can I make time for the computer and then get frustrated when the kids want my attention?
The duties that I have as a christian wife, mother, and farmer come before everything else. I still haven't made up my mind, but I'm pretty sure I'm leaning more one way.
Thank you friends for all your kind words and encouragement. It makes my heart glad to feel your support and know that I'm not the only one that struggles or feels this way. Lord bless!