What I've Been Up To

Hello friends. It's been a while and I feel it is time to give an update as to the comings, goings, and general happenings here on the farm and beyond. We have been busy around here and life is always happening. Time is not in abundance and everything has to have a priority. I am doing my best to be a good steward of what God has blessed me with and so, I have begun a journal so to speak to keep track of what has been done, what needs to be done, and anything in between. Farmhouse, homeschool, barnyard, and garden are my main sections with other subsections to help keep track. I am a person who must write everything down, if I don't I either forget what needs to be done or become overwhelmed with all there is to do. Writing is what helps me to think better and to know where I am in all of my to-do's.

This Fall was so beautiful and the kids and I found ourselves always making excuses for going outside. Thankfully we were able to be a little productive by enjoying the sunshine and picking up walnuts from our

walnut trees. I had such a wonderful time talking to the kids about the blessing of where we live, while watching them load the overflowing baskets with the little gems of nature's goodness and laughing at the same time. It does my heart good to see my children find joy in the simple things and to see their imaginations soar

with what God has provided in nature to play with. I am constantly at war with the temptation to let my kids

watch TV and movies. Maybe others think it a little thing, but I want my kids to grow up in reality. That a person knows how to think, how to work, how to enjoy what God has made, and that nothing is more important, exciting, or amazing than God is of utmost importance. The glitz of this world gives a false glow and it is unfortunately so alluring to children...and adults. My children have no idea how to operate a computer, get on the internet, or how to work the TV. They do know how to shoot their bows, catch chickens, cuddle chicks, and hunt for bison, grizzly bears, stone sheep, and moose in our back pasture. I am thankful beyond measure.

We were able to harvest our first animal on the farm a few months ago and it was truly a special experience. To have a steer arrive in a shrunken and wrinkled frame and to have had him end his days as a healthy, vibrant, and large animal was rewarding to say the least. The children were all present when the butcher arrived and they got to witness the whole process. There was no crying or shock, just excitement and interest in what was happening. The butcher was great with the kids and explained everything he was doing and how to do it. The kids got to see what the lungs, kidney, liver, and heart looked like and were amazed at how big Gus's stomach was. My little ones got to see firsthand where their food comes from and I was a happy mama to see that for them, as it should for all, this was normal and a day to be thankful. I was very pleased with how well our steers organs looked and the butcher said that he was very healthy. This is an animal who was true to the meaning of grass fed, no antibiotics, no hormones, no grain - just grass, sunshine, and time. Let me tell you

friends, the meat is some of the best we've ever eaten and we are thankful to have an extremely full freezer. I had the pleasure in the days to follow to render the tallow from our steer and it has beauty in its own right. There is so much to learn from living on a farm and caring for livestock. No matter what I'm doing, or where I turn, I see the hand of God intricately weaving glimpses of himself in what He has made. I am convinced that in my life of being a wife, mama, and shepherdess, that I am never far from the daily graces and blessings from the Lord.

Last week we got 30 chicks and let me tell ya, they are cute. It's difficult to be productive when there are so many adorable, chirping fuzzballs in the greenhouse brooder box. I go out often with the kids for obvious reasons, but I also let them hold the chicks quite a lot so the newbies get used to us. I have no use for crazy animals and so we will win the affections of our livestock either by handling or food. We are getting 20 more
tomorrow and so I've officially become a crazy chicken lady. Seriously, we're going to have almost 70 chickens total by tomorrow evening. Crazy. Chicken. Lady...   All joking aside we are taking a step of faith

and venturing into the egg business. I think it's something that is doable for my kids and I and so we have remodeled a second coop and are going to go for it. You will never know if you can do something unless you try. I have quite a few breeds living here on the farm because I like to try new things and I had a few new breeds that I want to give a try. Here is our chicken line up: Rhode Island Reds, Buff Orpingtons, Ameraucanas, Barred Rocks, Cuckoo Marans, and Black Australorps. The Ameraucana chicks are especially endearing because of their unique markings. Here's my favorite.


The most exciting thing that I'm doing right now is a little surprise that I'm doing for my dearly loved little ones. I feel so blessed to get to be a mama to the three precious souls that I've been given. There are some seriously hard, fall-on-your-knees-in-desperate-prayer moments and there are many melt-your-heart moments where there are silent prayers sent in a continuous stream to the Lord for His abundant mercy and grace. I have never felt the depth of my selfishness until I became a mama, nor have I felt the fierce love and willingness to do whatever it takes to care for another person, until I birthed a child. It is a miracle and a gift to be a parent, but it is also a tool for sanctification. Letters are my love language. I have begun a box for each

of my children am filling them with letters from me - their mama. One might be about my love for them,

another about what we did that day, and another may be about a struggle we are going through and I want

that child to know the whys and reasons why their mama handled it the way she did. I want to give my children a glimpse of themselves from their mama's perspective and tell them stories of what they did and funny things they said. I want to write them letters that will encourage them in the Lord and offer wisdom that I've learned so far. This will be kept a secret from them until they've grown and are ready to move out of the house. I pray and hope this will be a treasure and blessing for them since this will truly be from my heart. If you know my kids...mums the word.



There is so much more that I can say, but this must be enough for now. Following is a little collage of random happenings and bits of beauty that I've captured on the farm. I am forever grateful to my God above for all that He's given me and am thankful for you friends, readers, and fellow believers. I will do my best to be a more regular blogger once again. I'm thinking of doing a giveaway. What do you think?

That Woman

In the early years of my marriage I found myself drawn to martyrdom, and yes, I find myself still drawn. The way that the persecuted church just shines is just amazing and they are a bright and burning light in this dark and cruel world. I decided to read Foxe's Book of Martyrs and it had a profound and lasting mark on my life. It is full of stories of saints who paid with their lives to tell of the love of Christ. How can one measure one story against another? You can't really, but there is one story that has burned its way into my heart.

Its of a mother who had a young son and she had to watch him suffer and die. I am just going to warn you, if you are faint of heart, or don't like to deal with death, DON'T READ THIS POST! The contents following are hard to read (and type), but I am led to share this woman's story.

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"Here again Romanus, taking good occasion, made a long oration of the eternity of Christ, of His human nature, of the death and satisfaction of Christ for all mankind. Which done, he said, 'Give me a child, O prefect, but seven years of age, which age is free of malice and other vices wherewith riper age is commonly infected, and thou shalt hear what he will say.' His request was granted.

A little boy was called out of the multitude, and set before him. 'Tell me, my babe,' quoth the martyr, 'whether thou think it reason that we should worship one Christ, and in Christ one Father, or else that we worship many gods?'

Unto whom the babe answered, 'That certainly (whatsoever it be) which men affirm to be God, must needs be one; and that which pertains to that one, is unique: and inasmuch as Christ is unique, of necessity Christ must be the true God; for that there be many gods, we children cannot believe.'

The prefect hereat clean amazed, said, 'Thou young villain and traitor, where, and of whom learnedst thou this lesson?'

'Of my mother,' quoth the child, 'with whose milk I sucked in this lesson, that I must believe in Christ.' The mother was called, and she gladly appeared. The prefect commanded the child to be hoisted up and scourged. The pitiful beholders of this pitiless act, could not temper themselves from tears; the joyful and glad mother alone stood by with dry cheeks. Yea, she rebuked her sweet babe for craving a draught of cold water: she charged him to thirst after the cup that the infants of Bethlehem once drank of, forgetting their mothers' milk and paps; she willed him to remember little Isaac, who, beholding the sword wherewith, and the altar whereon, he should be sacrificed, willingly proffered his tender neck to the dint of his father's sword. Whilst this council was in giving, the butcherly tormentor plucked the skin from the crown of his head, hair and all. The mother cried, 'Suffer, my child! anon thou shalt pass to Him that will adorn thy naked head with a crown of eternal glory.' The mother counselleth, the child is counselled; the mother encourageth, the babe is encouraged, and receiveth the stripes with smiling countenance. ( If your crying now, please know that I can hardly see to type.)

The prefect perceiving the child invincible, and himself vanquished, committeth the blessed babe to the stinking prison, commanding the torments of Romanus to be renewed and increased, as chief author of this evil.

This was Romanus brought forth again to new stripes, the punishments to be renewed and received again upon his old sores. No longer could the tyrant forbear, but needs he must draw nearer to the sentence of death. 'Is it painful to thee,' saith he, 'to tarry so long alive? A flaming fire, doubt thou not, shall be prepared for thee and by and by, wherein thou and that boy, thy fellow in rebellion, shall be consumed into ashes.' Romanus and the babe were led to execution. When they were come to the place, the tormentors required the child of the mother, for she had taken it up in her arms; and she, only kissing it, delivered the babe. 'Farewell,' she said, 'my sweet child; and when thou hast entered the kingdom of Christ, there in thy blest estate remember thy mother.' And as the hangman applied the sword to the babe's neck, she sang on in this manner:

All laud and praise with heart and voice,

O Lord, we yield to thee:

To whom the death of this thy saint,

We know most dear to be.

The innocent's head being cut off, the mother wrapped it up in her garment, and laid it on her breast."

                                                                -Foxe's Book of Martyrs (end of chapter one)

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This story has more do with the child in ways and let me just say for sayings sake, I'm not sadistic nor do I desire any of my children to die like this dear boy.

I so deeply desire for my children to grow up to love and to know the Lord. I don't want to raise little pharisees that know all the rules, but inwardly are as dead as a corpse. There are so many things that I could want for them, but to know God is really my main concern. It is so convicting to read of this mother who no doubt loves her child, BUT she loves his soul more. By her words and her actions she proves where her heart truly lies, and it's with Jesus.

There are so many distractions, so many things begging for our attention, but at the end of the day what truly matters?

Over the past 6 months or so, the Lord has been greatly changing and impressing upon me the importance of a life lived for God. Nothing else matters. N-o-t-h-i-n-g. I have experienced a closeness with Jesus that I dare not to give up. He is more real than the air I breathe and I want to serve Him with every ounce of my being. It is so frustrating to fail and realize how far I truly fall short. And the fact that God chose to make me a mother is just amazing (and terrifying) to me. I am one of the most selfish people I know and I can rival my kids any day. Thankfully the Lord never gives up on His children.

I have been given a very precious treasure in Christ and it needs to be guarded and cherished. It also needs to be lived out and shared with those that God has placed in my life. I often wonder how this woman raised such a spiritually mature son and the young age of seven? How were their days together, what were their conversations like, how did she live in front of her son? I could cry right now just thinking about the hugeness of this task; this task of parenthood. This mother no doubt, did nothing but live, eat, breathe, sleep, and speak of Christ to her son. That sweet boy saw Jesus every day. He saw him dwell in his mother with such severity that he could not deny the power and reality of such a Savior. Oh, that this would be the case with me! I am not this woman, but I want to be her.

It hurts to think of being anything less than being totally devoted to Jesus.

I can't imagine witnessing such atrocities against any one of my children. I am almost to sobs just thinking about it. Then the heavier questions arise in my thoughts, "Is Jesus worth it? Does He mean enough to me to encourage my child(ren) or myself to suffer for His name? Is my treasure/heart with Jesus or do I care about comfort for myself and my family more?

May my walk grow stronger daily with Christ, may the frivolities of this life fall away every second, may I cling to Jesus with such severity that my children have no reason to deny our blessed Savior. May I live, teach, eat, breath, and show my children why were are alive...to serve our God....no matter what.

If you've never read Foxe's Book of Martyrs (AFL), you really should. Sure you'll cry, cringe, and be sick, but so be it. We live in such fluff, such comfort and ease that we have no sense of reality. People die every day for the name of Jesus. And no, they're not just shot and then die, they are tortured and suffer greatly.

There is so much more that I could say, but I'm sure once you've read this story, you'll understand what I mean when I say, "I want to be THAT woman."

Amen. So be it.

The War of the Mind

I have been at war.

There has been death and victory, but it still ensues. I believe it always will for as long as this earth rotates.
No doubt I have been absent from here and it may still continue. Priorities have changed and this outlet is one of those things that have undoubtedly had to lessen in my life.

I want to live in light of eternity and I will fight to do so everyday. I got sucked into blog-land and don't plan on letting it happen again. I don't mean that I wont blog anymore, but I will NOT let it become an idol in my life again. I tried to keep up with everyone else, tried to grow, and honestly I probably could if I really wanted to. But I don't.

Not at the expense of living to blog. Once your mind becomes geared towards growth you start to view everything you do as 'something to blog about'. Instead of enjoying your day, your trying to make it interesting so someone would want to see. Maybe others liked what they saw, but I'm sure God didn't. And that is what matters, what my Lord thinks.

I am a Christian and therefore I am a completely different person than who I was years and years ago. God has been working hard on me lately and I can say that every week I am a different person that I was the week prior. These past few months have been the most precious, tearful, and amazing months of my life. I have never felt so close to God and never have realized my smallness in comparison to His glory, until now. All this to say, I am wanting to fill my days with serving the Lord and am fleshing that out right now.

I am a wife and mother. These roles are greatly prized in the eyes of God and I am a blessed woman. The culture of our day despises these two roles, but I cling to God and not fallen world. I am daily trying to be more pleasing to God and by His strength, I am. Now don't get me wrong, nothing I do can make me any closer to God.  I have been saved by grace alone, but it is because of Gods saving power that I desire to walk in accordance with His will.

I also have some heavy burdens. Burdens that I believe are from God, but at the moment don't know what to do with them. My heart breaks daily and I just plead with the Lord to show me what He would have me do. I know that His timing in perfect and I believe He is shaping and molding me right now for what's to come. I watched a video last week that changed my life. I haven't been the same since. It is so hard to see and watch, but I implore you to watch it. It's disturbing, unbelievable, and heart-wrenching. It does have some disturbing images so please, don't watch it with your children. View it first and then you can decide if your children are mature enough to handle it.

I have always felt the desire to adopt. Ever since I can remember I know that its been something laid on my heart. I am open to whatever God wants. Whether its a child from our country or another, a child who has disabilities or not, a child who is not yet born or who may not get the chance to breathe. I pray God will lead me to be in the right place and the right time and be able to welcome another soul into our home. These children are horribly abused, how can anyone watch this and not break?

***I found last night that the woman who made this documentary has revisited this institution to see the changes made. There was an outcry when it first came out and the country felt the pressure to change. If you want to watch it go HERE. I have not watched this one yet...maybe tonight.

All this leads me to another thing that I want to bring forward to my readers. I mentioned it on my Facebook page, but I'll repeat it here. I am going to be getting rid of my 'the Shepherd's farm' Facebook page. I hardly ever use it and think its a waste of space. I don't want to be followed or 'Liked'. I would like to be friends.

If you would like to become Facebook friends then please send a request. I am more likely to post my updates and things that I care for there. It is much easier and honestly I don't blog so people can see how popular I am. I write because I enjoy it.

I really enjoy this space, I don't plan on stopping blogging altogether, but I do plan on being more intentional about what I blog about. I'm not going to take the time to blog everyday about our everyday lives, but I will blog about stuff that matters. 

I hope all of you are well and that you've felt the presence of the almighty God in your lives. I pray that you would follow through with conviction and live a life pleasing to God. Have a blessed weekend!

The Path Less Taken

I live a blessed life. Truly, I have a blessed existence. The Lord in His providence saw fit to place me here and gave me strong convictions about life and purpose. I have many thoughts coursing through my mind and at times, it is difficult to sort them through, to place them in the highest order of importance, and it can be draining to someone who wants to fix the worlds problems (me) and realize that I cannot. Only God can. I am His tool however and I pray that I will be used mightily.

My intention for this blog is not to show off my accomplishments (they are few) and to make much of myself. No, that is not my goal and I hope it doesn't seem to be. My goal for this blog is to journal mine and my family's life here on our farm so we can encourage others who would like to do the same. I want to be the Proverbs 31 woman. This may seem silly to you, but I desire to be her with every bone in my body. I can get discouraged when I read of her because I can see my failings so clearly, but God gave us this woman as an example of what a godly woman can and should be. I therefore conclude that He can also give me the strength to fulfill the role He desires for my life.

Every morning and evening when I go out to do chores I see God and His hand in creation. Life is bursting here on the farm. The fruit trees are already getting heavy with fruit. Apple, peach, plum, and pears - just to name a few. The walnut trees are absolutely majestic, so big and grand with their long branches and broad leaves. My seedlings - even under the care of a black thumb - are doing amazing. The tomato seeds I planted last week are growing like crazy! It seems like they grow every time I check on them, which is often. My pumpkins are still the greenhouse kings and they let the rest know it. Already, their vines are taking shape and towering over the other seedlings showing off their distinct leaves and quick growing ability. The chickens are pretty much full grown and we still have worries of a rooster. I hope we are wrong in our assumptions. *Only about 30 minutes after writing this post it was confirmed. We have a rooster.*

My sheep are another story. I called our shearer the other day and he's supposed to come out soon to clip them of their winter wool. I am awaiting this day with great anticipation because we aren't positive they are bred. Our ram is pretty young and even though his effort was never ending, we just aren't positive that he was - ahem - 'ready'. Time will tell and we still have a little while before we can officially say yea or nay. I so desperately want lambs this year, I may shed a few tears if we don't have any. Sniff. Wouldn't you?

I often wonder about this life that God has led my husband and I to. What is His plan, purpose, and direction for it? I read about, hear about, and witness people all around me getting the 'bug' so to speak. Right now it seems that people are really wanting to go back in time a bit and live a simpler life. People want to witness life in all it's forms. Really we all are wanting to see God and it is so easy to when you live this way. I'm not sure how you can deny His existence when you see a lamb be born, or your very first seedling pop up from the soil. It's truly a thrill! I believe 100% that the most miraculous event (physical...not spiritual. Salvation of course reigns supreme.) that a person experiences is the birth of a child. There is nothing sweeter than the reward of a child after the hours of travail and grueling pain. The sweet smell of a newborn, the warmth of their skin, looking them over intently and meeting the new little one that God has given you. I'm almost to tears right now, I love my babies!

Are you one of those people? Do you yearn for a garden, livestock, a simpler life? Do you desire a spouse, happiness, children? These are great things to desire, but I hope that all of us desire God the most. I hope that we surrender our lives to Him and let Him guide us. It is easy to get distracted these days; there are so many things that can take away our attention. The Lord is merciful and is always patient with this child of His - moi. He always gently leads me to the Rock that I can lean on, the River where my thirst will forever be quenched.

Physically my family is taking the path less taken. Farming is not necessarily glamorous and it seems that celebrity and glamour are what a lot of people want today. Farming is definitely not the life of ease.  We want a life that is spent growing, raising, and nurturing life so it can in turn nurture us. We desire to spend our time helping others, for we truly desire with our farm to bless others. Right now we are still figuring out the kinks, but this farm is not ours, it's God's and we want to use it to bless others, feed others, and point others to the One that matters.

Spiritually we are living the path less taken. It seems that the idea of God is attacked from every corner. And let me just say, God is NOT an idea. He is not just some moralistic 'being' that floats in the sky and tells us the things we cannot do. He is not some goody-two-shoes that is a pushover and merely makes suggestions for how people should live. He is not a figment of the imagination that people have created so they can explain away their fears. No, He is the embodiment of perfection. He is truth, He is holy, He is righteous, and He is just. He is the Creator of life and without Him, we wouldn't be.

May my life, my family, and yes, this blog point in one direction...up. I am living proof that God loves and saves sinners. Lord willing, my life will not be lived in vain. Lord willing, my husband and I will use what we've been given to bless and teach others.

When I am old and my life is spent, I hope to look back and see Christ and all the He's done through His servant.

I hope I will always continue to take the path less taken.

A Letter To My Son

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth.

Psalm 127:3-4

My dear boy, oh how I love thee. Everything about your precious face, your adventuresome spirit, and your strong will make me smile. My womb has surely been blessed. On the day you were born the Lord was doing a  great thing. You were placed in my care and when you breathed your first breath, I was then at that moment, made a mother.

Words cannot be sufficient when it comes to the awe of staring into the eyes of a newborn babe. God, the Creator of life, had perfected you in the womb and when He was finished, He had you arrive in the ordained day. And what a day it was. One cannot be in labor, be filled with pain and in travail, birth a child, and NOT see the hand of God. To refuse this is to be blind.

My son, our Lord has great plans for you. I know it for I already see Him at work in your heart. You've been given an able body, but whats more, you've been given a strong mind and a clear tongue. I pray you will grow up in wisdom and in the fear of God. I pray that you will be courageous and yet ever gentle in spirit.

Remember your favorite, David. He was a shepherd boy and cared for the lambs, but he killed what would have them. Remember his zeal for the Lord; his faith that God would protect him; his loyalty and honor; his remembrance of past promises and how he looked forward to the future promises of God.

Remember also my son, that the mighty in faith, even David, can fall into terrible sin. But God, He gives new hearts to His children and so be quick to turn away from sin and folly, be quick to fall on your knees before God with tears lamenting of your sin and ready to be filled with God's grace, mercy, and forgiveness.

Be humble.

You are still but a child and I, Lord willing, have many years more with you. I pray that God would make me a wise woman and mother, that He would make it clear how to raise you well, and that my love and labor with you would not be in vain.

My dear boy, my son, my heart, I love you.

Always know that there's One who loves you more, One who made this world, One who gives true happiness, peace, and meaning...and only One with the power to save.

Jesus.

Cling to Him as I do. For if you do you will be blessed with all spiritual blessings heaven has to offer.

I love you.

Love, Your Mama

One of my favorite passages of Scripture:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption though his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

Ephesians 1:3-14

Here's a myriad of pictures from Jude's birthday party last weekend.

A Sunset Walk

My family went on a walk last night and it was so very, very lovely. I've missed getting some 'fun' time with my kids and husband. We seem to always be busy with a project, building something, or just plain getting caught up with life.

This is the water shed that we're converting into our chicken coup. Can't wait till this eyesore is no more.

 I have learned over the past few weeks that if an effort is not made to communicate, then as time passes, assumptions are made and arguments ensue. (Please don't worry that we are having marital struggles. Actually far from it.) Like I said previously, we've been busy. There are so many things happening on the farm right now that we can hardly keep up with it all. I am not complaining mind you, and I am incredibly thankful that we are able to do all the fencing, organizing, and remodeling that we need to. It's quite a blessing from the Lord.

It is very easy though to get so busy that I forget to talk to the one who has my heart...my husband. The other night, we got in a little spat over a fence. I know, silly right? Ahem. Silly as it may be, we still had to work out a few 'assumptions', and then had to come to a point where we had to state what our thoughts were on the subject, and then come to an agreement. Wow, that was a mouthful.  Thankfully, my hubby and I are always able to come to an agreeable decision. This is the Lord's doing. If it were up to just us, well, I'm afraid we'd be a wreck. I'm terribly stubborn and hot tempered.

I had such a nice time walking in the pasture behind our house with my kids, hubby, and camera in tow. Jude was busy 'hunting' and Ella just did what she does best, she sang while she kept up. My girl loves to sing and it makes my heart happy to hear her pretty songs. Ella just melts me.

Seth and I spent the walk talking, holding hands, and dreaming about all that we wanted to do with this gorgeous place that God has given us. We always come back to the fact that we are blessed FAR beyond what we deserve. God is so good!

The sunset was breathtaking. I love how God puts His artwork on display every night. Nothing compares to His artistry and He is truly the only original.

The night ended with us getting to eat a delicious roasted chicken with vegetables and salad. One of my favorite dinners (the added bonus was that my in-laws are in town, so I didn't have to cook. Yay!). We sang a few hymns before bed and it was glorious. I mean it. My father-in-law and I sang the melody, while my hubby and his mama sang the harmony, the kids sang too and it was a lovely time of worship. I love to sing praises to God with my family. Such a wonderful way to end a beautiful sunset walk.

Amen.